Let not yours be the [merely] external adorning with [elaborate] interweaving and knotting of the hair, the wearing of jewelry, or changes of clothes; But let it be the inward adorning and beauty of the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible and unfading charm of a gentle and peaceful spirit, which [is not anxious or wrought up, but] is very precious in the sight of God. 1 Peter 3:3-4 (AMPC)
Many in the church have misinterpreted and twisted this passage of Scripture to teach and prohibit women from doing their hair, putting on jewelry and staying away from all kind of make-up. If that is what is meant then women shouldn’t also be putting on fine clothes or change clothes because that is also included in that verse of Scripture.
But that’s not what Peter is saying here.
The point here is true godly beauty. In verse one and two Peter tells women that they can without a word but rather through their submissive, reverent, and pure behavior win over their unbelieving husbands to the faith.
Then in verse three, contrary to the ways and standards of the world where physical outward beauty is glorified and trusted in above everything else, Peter tells Christian women that in God’s sight, it’s inward beauty that’s most important and of greatest real impact.
He explains that a gentle and peaceful spirit is the inward beauty that’s of the greatest worth in God’s sight.
While men look at outward appearance God looks at and is most interested in the heart.
So there’s nothing wrong with women doing their hair, putting on jewelry, changing or putting on fine clothes. But the emphasis, time, and effort shouldn’t be spent on those things.
A Christian woman’s true beauty, charm, and attractiveness shouldn’t be mere outward appearance and makeover but rather her inner self, the gentle and quiet spirit.
Outward physical appearance can change. Physical strength and beauty fades. But inward heart beauty is ageless. Haven’t you noticed people who were kind in their youth and they stay that way to old age? But how many people have you seen who are still as beautiful in their old age as they used to be in their youth? Proverbs 31:30 (GNT) Charm is deceptive and beauty disappears, but a woman who honors the LORD should be praised.
Women and certainly men as well should focus on the state of their inner self or heart more than on how they look on the outside.
Being gentle, understanding, peaceful, quickly forgiving, patient, kind, slow to anger and gracious are the beauty traits we should focus on developing and displaying more than outward physical looks.